Marital Conversations (Part 1 of a 4,738 Part Series)

(Yes, I stole that from The Colbert Report, I'm so lame.)




The setting: driving on yet another long ass road trip, this time to Albany
The time: last Friday, noonish
The place: somewhere not far southwest of Albany, on I-90


Me: See that sign over there, for Mr. Subb?
J: Yeah, are you hungry?
Me: No, see, I just think that's pretentious.
J: Mr. Subb is pretentious?
Me: Yeah, why the second "b"? It's totally extraneous and pretentious.
J: There really aren't many pretentious deli owners.
Me: It's just, that "b" isn't even related to anything. SuBmarine sandwich, one "b", suBway, one "b"...why does he need 2?
J: Maybe Mr. Subb is his name.
Me: No, I don't think so, I just think he's trying too hard to be cool. It's wasteful.
J: Are you saying that, in this time of economic crisis, that it is imprudent to have an extra "b"?
Me: Exactly. Think of all the money they could be saving on ink and such, not having to print an extraneous "b" on all their napkins and cups.
J: You should totally write a letter to Mr. Subb, of Mr. Subb, Inc.
Me: I'm sure it's Mr. Sub, of Mr. Subb, Inc., and I think I will.

He totally gets me.