Giuliana was due 11/2*/07 and boy, was I ready. I didn't have a hard pregnancy, it was actually pretty easy, but it was long, and I was uncomfortable and wanted to see my baby! Well, she didn't come that day, or the next, infact, she had to be forced out a week late.
I went into Lourdes on 12/*/07 for an induction. I had been feeling crampy in my back, but had no true signs of labor. They gave me a special medication around 7pm to help soften my cervix and told me it had to stay in all night. I was miserable that night. I could not get comfortable, my back was killing me, I had a blood pressure cuff on my arm all night long that would automatically inflate occasionally to take my BP, and I had a contration belt monitor strapped around my large waist that had two wires running to a machine next to me. Oh, and I had an IV, "just in case" they needed it. Yeah, sleep was not really an option.
In the morning, the nurse took the medication out and I was able to take a quick bath, which helped me get a little more comfortable. It was a very temporary relief.
At 8am, my doctor came in and broke my water and hooked me up to a pitocin IV drip. OH MY GOD. When they tell you everything speeds up when your water breaks and when they give you pitocin, they ain't kiddin. Within 30 minutes my back was spasming with every contraction that, of course, would not let up. I tried everything to be comfortable, sitting, laying, getting in the bath, getting out of the bath, bending over the bed, kneeling, leaning on John...it didn't help.
After about 2 hours I gave up. I had to, I was exhausted already. I asked for a shot of stadol. The stadol knocked me out in between contractions, but it didn't dull the pain of the contrations at all. And it only lasted an hour. I asked for another shot at 11am, but that one made me sick, which along with everything else, wasn't very fun. At noon, I gave in all the way and asked for an epidural.
It took forever for the doctor to come down and give it to me. And they give it in the back, folks, where I was having nearly all my pain. They warn you that the administration of the epidural itself hurts, but then you get the sweet relief of the drugs soon after. Yeah. It's all true. But they don't tell you that getting the epidural hurts more than anything else. Especially when you are getting contractions the whole time and are in back labor, which I was, only I didn't know it at the time. So, anyway, after that hell, everything did get better.
The epidural worked just fine, and I actually slept for the next few hours. Around 4pm the nurses came in to check on me because my monitor was showing a drop in the baby's heart rate with each contraction. They had me move around to several different positions, which was fun, because my legs were almost completely numb by then. Nothing worked, though. After a half hour or so of trying everything, they had to stop the pitocin, which was causing the contractions that Giuliana couldn't handle. The hope was that my body, being so far advanced in labor already, would take over and keep going naturally. This, unfortunately, didn't happen. They tried the pitocin again after about an hour, but the same thing happened.
So, at 8pm the doctor told me they needed to do a c-section to get the baby out. My body wasn't going to finish the labor in a "timely" way, and once your water is broken you must deliver within 12 hours or the baby can get infections and worse. And I couldn't continue the pitocin, because that was causing her heart rate to drop. So, it was my only option. I was ready for it, though. I knew in my heart it was coming for some time. And, really, by then, I was sooooo done with the whole labor thing! They prepped me for surgery and gave me more epidural medicine, which made me sick again, and also caused me to go completely numb from the neck down. I couldn't move anything. And I wasn't very awake, either. John, who had been by my side the whole time, and who had been wonderful, had to leave the surgical suite for about 15 minutes while they prepped me. He told me later that they gave him scrubs and just left him alone out in a hall...he was freaking out. Finally they let him come in and they draped me and did the surgery...when I tell you I didn't feel a thing-I am not kidding. I remember some tugging, but that's it.
And then she was there. At 8:24pm 12/*/07, Giuliana was born. I remember the doctor saying "it's a girl" and they brought her over to show me. She was so beautiful. And cone headed. It turns out she had been wedged in my pelvis backward (back labor) which explained all the back pain! They took her away again, and John went with her, and they finished me up.
I lay there while they monitored me after they stopped the epidural. Once it began to wear off, I had this overwhelming sensation that I was going to choke. I kept trying to tell the nurses, but they pretty much ignored me. One of them told me that was normal. But let me tell you-it was the scariest part of the whole thing. I literally felt like I was going to choke on my own spit, and I couldn't move my head or my arms or anything to help myself. And the nurses couldn't give me a drink of water or help me sit up...nothing. This feeling lasted for about 10 minutes, but it was pure hell.
They wheeled me into a recovery room and I had to wait for about another 20 minutes. Finally that horrible sensation went away, but then I began shaking uncontrollably...my body's reaction to all the stress, adrenialin, drugs, hormones....That lasted for the next several hours.
About 30 minutes after she was born, they brought Giuliana in to me. She was swaddled in her blankets and in her little bassinet. John came in a few minutes later and took her out so I could "hold" her (I couldn't really hold her due to all the shaking and numbness, but he held her in my arms.) She looked right into my eyes. She was absolutely the most beautiful baby I had seen in my life. And she was mine. Ours. John and I both cried, and continued over the next few days in the hospital.
It was so overwhelming and beautiful. And stressful. She had trouble breastfeeding, and that was so hard to deal with, for her and us. But, the absolute best moment of my life was the night after she was born. I got her out of her bassinet and brought her into bed with me. That was a feat in and of itself, as I had just had major abdominal surgery, and was heavily medicated. But I got out of bed and went around to her bassinet and picked that little warm bundle up and brought her back to bed. I unwrapped her and settled her in on my bare chest. And we slept together. She was in the same postion outside of my body as she had been in on the inside of my body for 9 months. She still fit. It was the most incredible feeling in the universe. And I feel in love. Hard.
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